Friday, 4th February 2005.


Running out of Steam

You know you've been playing too much Half Life 2 when...

You feel the urge to answer every unwanted phone call with "I'm sorry Gordon, I'm rather busy right now".

You find a pile of crates that have been stacked on the other side of the room to assist you with a desk move. You approach them with caution for fear of finding a head crab inside.

You find yourself trying more and more to master the art of telepathy - or, at the very least, attempting to conduct entire conversations without opening your mouth once.

When you leave the office and cross the car park, you are amazed that you can go straight there without having to wait for thirty seconds while the world freezes around you.

When the photocopier refuses to work, you want to hit it with a crowbar.

You spend fifteen minutes looking for your gravity gun, so that you can lift those boxes out to the garage, before the penny drops.

Whenever you experience distortion on the telephone line, you put it down to outdated sound card drivers.

You find any device with more than one button on it needlessly complex.

Thick-rimmed NHS glasses really do seem *incredibly* sexy lately.

You abandon the names you had previously chosen for your unborn child, and actually start to consider Barney as a viable alternative.

Every time a helicopter flies over your garden on its way to the Abingdon military base, you start to panic.

When you look down, you are amazed to see your feet.

The 'E' button on your keyboard seems to solve every problem - or so you'd think, anyway.

You keep forgetting that you don't have to be standing two inches from your manager's face in order to hear what she's saying.


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