Thursday, 9th December 2004.

Transport of delight

The wheels on the bus go round and round,
Round and round, round and round
The wheels on the bus go round and round
All day long...

This, of course, is utter bollocks. I think that it was one night in Italy when we reached this conclusion, while strolling back from an American-themed restaurant in Lido, offshore from Venice. The wheels on the bus do not go round and round for the entire day: there are plenty of occasions when they are still.

So Emily and I came up with something that went a little like this:

The wheels on the bus go round and round,
Round and round, round and round
The wheels on the bus go round and round
All day long.

Except when the bus is stopped at lights,
Stopped at lights, stopped at lights
Except when the bus is stopped at lights
All day long.

Or when the driver's on his break,
On his break, on his break
Or when the driver's on his break
All day long.

Or when the bus is picking up,
Picking up, picking up
Or when the bus is picking up
All day long.

Or when the bus is setting down,
Setting down, setting down
Or when the bus is setting down
All day long.

Or when the bus is getting fuel,
Getting fuel, getting fuel
Or when the bus is getting fuel
All day long.

Or when the bus has broken down,
Broken down, broken down
Or when the bus has broken down
All day long.

Or when the bus has crashed and burned,
Crashed and burned, crashed and burned
Or when the bus has crashed and burned
All day long.

Or when the driver's out on strike,
Out on strike, out on strike
Or when the driver's out on strike
All day long.

<puts case on bed on top of pillow, covers with duvet>